I Want to Leave A Legacy...

I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much

I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy

Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...

These lyrics remind me of my great grandmother whose eighty-eighth birthday just passed. Fortunately for her, she spent it in Heaven.

My great grandmother was someone who was closer to me than any other extended family member. She was more of my second mom than anything else. I and the rest of her grandchildren and great grandchildren referred to her endearingly as "Grammie," and I will continue to do so throughout the rest of this post.

Grammie was a huge part of my life. My mother had been taking care of her (Taking her to the grocery store and bank, helping with financial things, paperwork, etc.) for the past ten years, ever since I was three years old. And wow... She made an impact on my life.

She may have made me a little more bossy. Yes, Grammie did have an incredible ability to tell people what to do. I'm sure it wasn't intentional- she just couldn't help but remind my mom to change my little brother's diaper.

She told me great stories throughout the course of her life, and did much to spark my imagination and curiosity as a writer.

The hours spent playing games with her will leave memories in my mind forever.

But most of all, she inspired me to be like her- A good, strong, beautiful, Christian woman who stuck strong to her faith and everything else that she believed in.

She left behind a legacy- something to be remembered by. And it's something that I will never forget, along with many others.

Grammie passed away on August 15th. Her mail was forwarded to my house, and when we got home from our trip today, three birthday cards from people who are unaware of her passing awaited. I just read them, and when I did, I could feel the love for their dear friend coming out. It's obvious why.

I won't go into detail. You can't really feel how... How amazing someone like this is unless you really meet them. But as I continue the rest of my life without one of the dearest women in the world to me, I just want to take a few moments to write about her, her extreme faith, and the legacy that she has left.

I was writing a song for the novel I'm working on today, and although it wasn't intended to be personal, as I read it over, I found that it was. I also found that it applied to this post. (And I found that it sounds way too much like the song I quoted earlier- unintentionally, of course.)

I imagined that I died today
And no one knew what to say
If they didn't care, then they'd look rude
If the cried it'd be a lie

As I looked down on the scene
I wondered what I'd left behind
Noting to be remembered
It wasn't what I'd hoped to find

And now I'm standing here in the rain
Letting tears fall down my face
Begging you to tell me what you'd want

I just don't want to be despised
I never want to make someone cry
I want to be loved while I'm here

I want to leave a legacy
Something to make you remember me
Something to be missed once I'm gone

So I'm giving you my heart and soul
Do with it what you like
Make it so it pleases you
So that when I'm gone I'm still loved

'Cause I want to leave a legacy

I never meant to do anything wrong
I didn't want to break your heart
I just wanted to create a time to remember
But I ended at the start

I guess I went too far
Now you just remember what you hate
I should have stopped when I knew that it was right
So instead you'd remember this day

And now I'm standing here in the rain
Letting tears fall down my face
Begging you to tell me what you'd want

I did you wrong
I ignored the sad song
Of the cries of those that I love

And now they wouldn't mind
If they could find
If they couldn't find me ever again

I imagined that I died today
And no one knew what to say
If they didn't care, then they'd look rude
If they cried it'd be a lie

As I looked down on the scene
I wondered what I'd left behind
Nothing to be remembered
It wasn't what I'd hoped to find

I just want to leave a legacy
So that when I'm gone
I'm still loved

Thank you, Grammie for touching my life...
And for leaving a legacy.
Happy birthday.
<3